The one where I grump about Captain Tightwad... I am!!
I had a bill sitting there for the fancy satellite radio... still debating that one - its $12.99 a month. Captain Tightwad laid down his ultimatum and said it's my cool phone or the cool radio -- I cannot have both. Seriously? What am I 12? I work full time too - EVERYONE I have "joked" about this with has defended my position, my stance and my ability to pay for said service--- and yet the tightwad I married stood in our office with his cranky face on and proceeded to tell me what for... and tried in vain to defend his position... shall I demonstrate?
Captain Tightwad (CT for short): How many memberships do you all ready have?
Me: Two, Ladies group and Shriner's Group - $50 per year dues for both
CT: What about your massage membership?
Me: You have one too - that cancels out.
CT: No it doesn't yours is $10 more than mine- and I can cancel at any time.
Me: Me too contract was over in June.
CT: (insert crickets chirping)
ME: what else do I belong to? (smarty-pants.. left unsaid he was already grumpy)
CT: What about your phone with the web membership- and
Me: We pay one set price for that -- AND it was supposed to be a Christmas gift which you have consistently peed on over and over again before and after we got them!
CT: Again crickets.
Me: What else do I belong? Nothing - you haven't come up with $500 per year
CT: your massage thing costs more than that -- you have your nails done, and all the rest,
ME: again - massage is both so can't count -- the rest isn't a club with a membership, its basic girl maintenance...
CT: (he plays his last card in the deck) You don't care - restraint is not in your world is it? Do you ever want to retire.....
ME: (now hearing elevator music punctuated with the Charlie Brown Teacher in the back ground)
Gets seriously old doesn't it? Nana is right it is now time to deploy the Mina methodology... I work I deserve to enjoy a bit of that labor so Monday I will get my PO box, and I will find the work credit union and I will deposit a set amount of money in that account for use for nails, hair, groups and the like. It will be earned by me, used my me and not for anything Bubba related. Mother's day will be split - his mama the regular account - mine my account. Birthday and Christmas presents also the same - thereby ending the discussion of what, where, when and how. Kiss my yinzer grits.
He is out of town this week --perfect time to get it together. I will call the office mate Monday say I will be in a bit late - get the post office done, deal with the credit union later in the week and done!
Tell me something is there another man in this country or any other for that matter who so objects to his wife's personal maintenance? I mean hair and nails are pretty basic - oh sure if we were drowning in debt and not working etc I wouldn't get to enjoy these things but - we are both working, no kids, (knock wood) dogs are all right - cars are paid for... why can't I have brown (and not grey hair) and pretty nails? Not to mention unbushy eyebrows? I'm off to find something else to do with my day besides plot various murderous plots and their failures to keep me out of jail...
What's on the tube on Sundays when it isn't football season?
I'll check the NFL channel anyway - then see what the food channel has to offer - oh screw it I'm going to watch Steel Magnolias again... I need a good laugh.
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