I write this gingerly hoping and praying that just we're done for today of things breaking down... thankfully Bubba is at work... but when he gets home - oh boy aren't we in for some fun now.
First it was the Internet at home - I had bills to pay and things to deal with, thoughts to post - but NO... the stupid Internet let kept going off and on and off and on... it was like beat the clock to see if you could click and load fast enough before the stupid connection crapped out again. So I call large nameless telephone company, sort through Miss pleasant voice commands she "checks" the line, and pronounces it fine - just as the light comes back on, and just as I'm having the thought to say "OK fixed" the light goes out again... and I hit the "give me a freaking human to talk to key"... and who do I get... You guessed Jamel from right up the road in India. He walks me through a few things - and after a screwed up password on my part and his not getting the concept that the button isn't there for me to click on Jamel... I am left with "I have a ticket logged to the network guys and they will call you in 24 hours." Well super-de-duper I'll be at work in 24 hours and they will probably do something helpful like call the house and leave a message. We'll see.
Second and this is a major boo-boo the garage door won't go down... I was out front raking leaves (more on this later) finished and went into the house. Then as I prepared to go out shopping at the grocery store I realized that the garage door was open and needed to be closed. No go.. it goes about 2 inches and returned to its present upright and locked position. (and oh yes I have been flying too much) After trying the button the car, and a prayer none of the above worked. I was talking to Mom and she said "let him deal with it" as I was debating calling the neighbor for a hand - she's right - get your lilly white fanny home and deal with this - I'll handle the Internet - the garage is your sugarplum and if it ain't working you're staying home to deal with it I've got things to do.
So we've called Bubba he ain't happy but he's heading home this should be a fun time - and I might update depending upon just how much I can squeeze out of this mess..
But for the OTHER topic of today... why was I out front raking leaves in the first place? That is the question I asked myself about 3/4 of the way through the process. I have shoveled snow until I never want to see another flake again, while his pampered fanny is out on the west coast "working" ever so hard. We came home yesterday and TOGETHER cleaned up the back yard - Bubba did do the "present" patrol then he says to me "you can do the front yard tomorrow." Can I now skippy? I won't mention the fact that 2 makes the job go faster and a ticked off Aunt Ing is not the place you want to go - especially when you are leaving town again so soon... you just might find the locks changed. I have the check book passwords and I can screw with you there too.
Oh I did it. And I PROMISE you he'll say something about the job done, the recycle bag I used... and then they will find him in said recycle bag and Aunt Ing on the back deck with a drink and smile.
Then the garage door won't be a problem as I will lock the door to the house, put a lock on my freezer and put a sign out front that says "fire sale" - buy it before I haul it out and set it on fire... did I mention 99.8% of the crap in the garage is his? Figured by the context you'd gotten that one but sometimes subtlety is a lost art.
Ok so I'm off to wait the arrival of Bubba, find some good ju-ju candles to burn and perhaps offer up a sacrifice to the gods just in case. Say a prayer for me - Bubba is going to try and fix something - and he's tired and cranky. Won't this be fun?
Stay tuned.
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