My final post...

I will now be going into the Witness Protection Program as soon as Bubba gets home. Why? In my attempt at getting things done, I was moving the nick-nacks out of the cabinet in preparation of painters next week. THE most expensive thing in there, I break.

Now this is the second Lladro we've bought - SAME statue but bought twice as the cleaning woman broke it the first time. As I gently pulled the statue out I thought I was clear... I wasn't and the little delicate's (insert bad word here) hand popped off along with 2 fingers. Just shoot me now. I am anxiously scouring the web for someone who can fix this right. You will feel the disturbance in the force I think about Tuesday. Sunday he'll be too tired to notice, Monday will be a work day and he won't notice... Tuesday... I am a dead woman Tuesday. Did I mention it's the same freaking hand as the previous one? I mean really! Cripes and double. I've got code to distract me right now but I will have all afternoon to hunt down ANYONE who could fix this... And before you suggest super glue - no no can't do that it ruins the shiny finish of the piece the cleaning lady tried that too.

Maybe I can distract him with - um 'private time' -- yeah that isn't a long term idea either.


And now under the category of "are you kidding me?" I was behind a car today that had a ribbon magnet that just made wonder. It said (and I quote) "I break for squirrels." Seriously? You spent money on this? And put it on your car? In public? Did they suddenly become a threaten species of animal? Because those things live in Washington DC where I think they could walk across parts of the river for the 'stuff' in there... and what is this person going to do when she zigs to miss said squirrel and it zags and well the breaks aren't just fast enough? There is probably some therapy for that it involves holding a furry tail and chanting with nut-scented incense. I send the great squirrel spirit my saddened heart and the spirit of the small creature that couldn't pick a freaking direction....